Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Employ A Librarian

A fellow librarian sent the following to me from a blog post titled, "Why you should fall to your knees and worship a librarian." I think maybe worship is a bit strong. Instead, how about, "Ply with gifts and bottles of wine and garlands of flowers...bestow with honor as a valued member of society...provide bounteous means of employment..."

OK sure. We've all got our little preconceived notions about what librarians are and what they do. Many people think of them as diminutive civil servants, scuttling about "Sssh-ing" people and stamping things. Well, think again buster.

Librarians have degrees. They go to graduate school for Information Science and become masters of data systems and human/computer interaction. Librarians can catalog anything from an onion to a dog's ear. They could catalog you. Librarians wield unfathomable power. With a flip of the wrist they can hide your dissertation behind piles of old Field and Stream magazines. They can find data for your term paper that you never knew existed. They may even point you toward new and appropriate subject headings.

People become librarians because they know too much. Their knowledge extends beyond mere categories. They cannot be confined to disciplines. Librarians are all-knowing and all-seeing. They bring order to chaos. They bring wisdom and culture to the masses. They preserve every aspect of human knowledge. Librarians rule. And they will kick the crap out of anyone who says otherwise.


  1. funny! but, scarily so....

  2. Yeah, librarians! What about geeks? How do they compare?

  3. Are there librarians working for Google? I'll bet Google has a whole division of librarians and geeks working together on world domination.

  4. Yes, Michie, I think you're right. This technocratic geekdom is configuring and programming as we speak.

    "Blessed are the geek, for they shall inherit the earth." Few are aware that this is the correct translation.

  5. I like that translation! Crackin' me up!!